Are we parents yet?

The Clements’ IVF Journey

Ugh March 28, 2009

Filed under: Pregnancy,Random thoughts — Aria @ 11:20 am

That is how I feel. Ugh.

It’s odd how I both am thinking, “Damn, I don’t want to feel nauseated and achy and tired and headachy and my tummy in knots,” but on the other hand, I know I’m lucky to get to be in this position. It is bad of me to complain about feeling blah when it’s a step I must take to get what we want?

I know there are many MANY people in this country who are in the position of needing IVF to have a baby. But this isn’t the UK. You either have a lot of money, the ability to get into a ton of debt, insurance that might cover a little bit of something, or a combination of those. Two years ago I had none of them (if you don’t use credit AT ALL, then it’s surprisingly hard to start once you try – being able to live within your means doesn’t sow responsibility to the credit bureaus, and your credit score really is a measure of how much interest can be made off of you, which is why paying on a card for five years looks better than paying it in full every month).

And then we got insurance that covers some, even if it has been a fight to get them to pay, but it was enough to get us in the door at Stanford, and then into debt from there. I don’t even like to think about how much debt we have right now, but oh well. I guess $15,000 or so isn’t so bad in the scheme of things. The average debt including all non-home loans that Americans have is far more than that. So we’re in good shape.

And we really are lucky to “get” to have this kind of debt. It’s not the kind for a plasma tv and other things we don’t need and will throw out in ten years. It’s for something for the rest of our lives. A baby is worth it.

Still, I’m wanting to complain about feeling like hell, like I’ve been beaten with a bag of bricks. How I feel right now is comparable to the chemo I had, though not quite as bad just yet. It’s only a bag of bricks versus being smacked with a big-rig truck.

I am nauseated a lot and have been throwing up a lot, a few times just barely making it to the bathroom and not even getting over the bowl properly. Poor toilet seat. So naturally this makes me worry about whether or not I’m taking in enough calories and nutrients, though I haven’t been losing weight, so I guess that’s okay, right? I’m also taking Centrum multi-vitamins with two additional calcium/magnesium/zinc supplements, and 800mg of folic acid.

Also, completely off-topic, but I thought that this story is very sweet. A couple divorced after 27 years of marriage, and then the ex-husband needed a kidney transplant. The ex-wife volunteered to be tested and was a match. Through all of this, they fell in love again, and remarried 17 years after they divorced. ๐Ÿ™‚ I love these heart-warming stories


3 Responses to “Ugh”

  1. xyneshia Says:

    Morning sickness (“all day feeling like shit sickness that goes away just in time for your boobs to hurt like hell sickness”) is a very special rite of passage. Embrace it, it means that you are having a normal pregnancy, one without symptoms would worry me. BTW it is normal to lose some lbs early on because of loss of appetite and vomiting so dont worry too much about it. Maybe suggest switching to regular prenatal vitamins, the ones you have contain Vit A which you probably dont wanna take during pregnancy. Congrat’s again! ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. psychohist Says:

    If you’re not losing weight, I wouldn’t worry about the calories this early. The fetus is still tiny, and doesn’t need a lot of calories yet.

    Morning sickness usually abates by the time the fetus is big enough that you need extra food – usually the second trimester or so.

    You do need adequate vitamins, but it sounds like you’ve got that covered.

    I liked that story too!

  3. babymamawannabe Says:

    Aria, congratulations on your pregnancy. Thank you for this blog. And you are entitled to every feeling you have, even if it is blah over something you have always wanted. My husband and I have been going back and forth about how we feel about all the money we’re spending on infertility treatments (we’re not quite at IVF yet), and we keep reminding ourselves that when we have a baby, we won’t care how much we spent. That said, there are those times when one just wishes we could do it for free like regular crackheads. Right?


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